♥ ALBANIAA

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This is how I live, love, laugh my life.

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Monday, September 29, 2008
4:24 AM

RAYA, RAYA, RAYA.
I’m in the RAYA mood. How fast time flies. Last year, I didn’t get to celebrate much due to O’s and the year before, I had my N’s. How great! So this year, I’m going to compensate for what was lost. Lol.
And this year, the theme colour is GOLD! ‘________’

I can see how Mummy is excited for RAYA. (& that includes me too). This year, I’ve been going to gaylang only twice. Compared to my secondary school years, I’ve been going to gaylang almost every weekend during the fasting month. I miss the smell of RAYA clothings and the burning smell of deng deng! Each time I went to gaylang, a deng deng is a MUST!

Been spending most of my time at granny’s place. This year, mummy, kak heri and auntie zed will be cooking all the dishes for RAYA since granny is still sick.

Tmrw is a school day and I’m not in the mood to another mundane presentation.
During semester one, my grades were downright suckier than any of the slackers in W35A. I skipped lessons, halfway through I escaped from presentations and the only thing I did at my laptop was MSN-ING, Friendster-ing, blogging and not forgetting, WEBCAMING. I thought during semester two, I would change for the better. But it became worst I tell you!

Can anyone put me in the mood to strive harder and make things easier for me so that I would not spend another 5 YEARS in rp!?
I told you, things like these always caused me to have panda eyes 0_0

So, after RAYA, I will make myself useful in class this time round.(I know I’ve said it 289732683298th times).
I’m having RAYA and holiday mood now, so no point.

I want to stop falling deeper now. I’ve learnt that things will be much wiser if I held myself back from falling. I choose to be with reality so as to make myself believe that everything happens for a reason.
I don’t know where the mistake lies. I don’t know why HE put this barrier between us.

I cried days when I sensed that the love is no longer there. I tried, not that I don’t, to be happy and acted as if nothing happened.
I choose to believe what I read and what I saw without hearing your side of story.
I was in the midst of battling myself with these.
Deep down inside, never have I thought that it would end this way.

I make that choice because I know it’s better this way.
To know that you no longer feel the same way as I do was very hurting.
For a day, it hurts. But for days, it hurts even more than you could ever imagine.
I blame neither one of us, cos I choose to believe that we are FATED this way.

Ever since the day you stepped foot in my life, not once did I not smile. I was happy when you came. You make me forget my misery, and that guy.
Right now, those feelings starts to fade.
And I thank god for that.

Thanks to _______.

I smiled till today, cos you make me feel happy.

Labels: its you baby.